Posted on January 1, 1  •  3 minutes  • 437 words

I was filling out a form for a blood donation, they had the usual stuff like name and ID number but there were very strange questions like “Tourier name” and other stuff that didn’t make sense. The staff was not helpful at first, until I asked for a specific staff member that helped my sister before, she ended up going through old (physical) records looking for my sister’s form so we can see what the values are supposed to be. Eventually we found it but then it came to the last item on the list called “Chain ID” and it was an absurdly long string of hexadecimal characters so it took me forever to fill it, but then the lady said my time is up so I had to stop. They gave me a tote bag that had 1h+ printed on it, since it had apparently taken me 1 hour to unsuccessfully fill out the form. I then rewound time and retried a couple times now that I remembered all the details. Then when I finally got the chain ID right, they gave me a second paper that said “congratulations on successfully copying the Chain ID, where did you learn the skill of copying long arbitrary strings?” and I wrote “I like to type out URLs that I see in youtube videos”. Then they told me “unfortunately our AI has determined that you seem homosexual so we can’t accept your donation”.

Later, I was at what felt like the last day of school, this wasn’t any school I know. it looked like a mall and it had many different screens displaying ads and maps and stuff. I snuck into one of the backrooms and plugged in something that looked like a Raspberry Pi Zero, but with a full sized ethernet port into one of the racks. It took a couple seconds but every display screen in the facility changed to parodies of what they were displaying. Like they looked normal at a glance except the text was all absurd stuff like “kiss your homies goodnight” on the ad for a mattress store. I then magically swapped out my clothes for Rachel Amber’s outfit and skated away. My view then switched to some lady in office attire trying to find out who did it. She got a text from me that said something like “ur cute, wanna come over for a drink :3”. She knew it was me because no one had her personal number. I woke up before I could see the conclusion to that one, but I doubt they found me because I’m a supa hacka.